Perception: “Reality doesn’t bite, rather our perception of reality bites.” – Anthony J. D’Angelo

In my personal life, I encountered a huge shift in my perception. For the longest time, I struggled with accepting the fact that life is going to happen to me whether I like it or not. As I kicked, screamed and dug my heels in, I ended up creating more suffering for myself. I kept falling victim to life and often felt I was kicked when already down. I fell prey to a “Why me?” mindset and felt tossed around by circumstances thrown my way. My thoughts were rampant and spiraled into negative dark alley ways. Don’t get me wrong, this is still a work in progress. I’m not out of the woods yet.

But breakthrough has started to occur! In Tony Robbins’s powerful documentary on Netflix, “I Am Not Your Guru,” he states, “Life is not happening TO you, it is happening FOR you.” This phrase rang true for me and switched on the light bulb. As a result, I am able to move away from a victim mindset into an empowered mentality. It has taken me a long time to come to acceptance that life will always do its thing and it’s up to me to change my attitude about it. The world is not going to change, people are not going to change, BUT I can change!


When I find myself stuck with my thoughts and wrestling to break free, I often come back to this quote: “What we think, say and do, is based on what we know. And what we know could be wrong.” This quote reminds me that I’m just one thought away from getting unstuck. All it takes is a slight shift in thinking to radically change the course of life. Tony calls this the 2 mm shift. It’s a fascinating concept that demonstrates how a small 2 mm shift can extrapolate over time into a completely different outcome.

As soon as I find myself getting upset or complaining, I have the opportunity to change my focus. In these moments, I’m learning to move away from complaining and to start reciting what I’m grateful for. Instead of asking “Why me?” questions, I’m learning to change my questions to “What is great about this problem?” Although these decisions are slight, they drastically change the directional trajectory my mind and focus was heading in.

Here’s the trailer for Tony’s documentary, “I Am Not Your Guru”: